Embarking on a Journey

My favorite metaphysical shop in San Angelo, Texas: “Gypsy Moon”. (The Universe led me to this shop, but that’s a story for another post)

**Trigger Warning: Mentions of suicide attempt and mental health**

It all began with the vulnerability that stemmed from my own personal healing journey. Something that I’ve been uncovering over the past couple of years, which will probably take a lifetime. Up until a couple years ago, I didn’t realize that healing was a constant process that required effort. A process of learning new things, while also unlearning a lot. With it came along an invitation to fear, all while feeling a lot of things simultaneously: a transformative experience.

Back in 2021, I was in a really dark place mentally. I was overwhelmed with life and how I was feeling. I wanted the pain to end, so much so, that I attempted to end my life not realizing the lasting impact it would have on myself and others around me. Shortly after, I moved away from home for a fresh new start, not really processing what had happened. I wanted to give this thing called “life” another shot. Looking back at it, I was really just running away from the root problems I didn’t want to face.

Life was great for a while, but I never expected to relapse within a year of moving. That’s the thing about mental health though. Sometimes it creeps up un-announced and it doesn’t matter who you are or where you are in life, especially when it revolves around unresolved trauma. As my mental health was slowly relapsing, my dad passed away in 2022. Although I was never very close to him, grief snuck up on me, spiraling me deeper into depression. I was confused and I was angry at the world, and again I struggled to find purpose. Without much thought, I decided it was time to go back home to recenter myself and to find myself again.

Being back home allowed me to focus on the things I loved doing again: painting, running, being outdoors, and spending time with family and friends. (When I wasn’t working of course). That’s exactly what I did for the next couple of years… I focused on myself, and I picked myself back up again piece by piece. I allowed myself to be vulnerable this time instead of pushing aside what I was feeling. Since my attempt, my perspective on life had tremendously changed. From that moment on, I strived to live “one day at a time” while also enjoying the “little things” in life.

2024 came around, and life was as good as it had ever been. For once in my life I felt content. I was alive, healthy, and happy. I was proud of how far I had come. One day, something in me sparked this idea of getting my yoga teacher certification. I still don’t really know exactly where the idea stemmed from, but it felt like a higher calling or purpose within myself. I’ve always been a pretty spiritual person, but I had lost touch with that side of myself somewhere along the journey of life. It had been years since I had sat down and meditated, but the Universe was calling me back to myself so I did just that.

I made a promise to myself that year. I told myself that I would start on my yoga teacher training certification, and I did. I was working full time as a Graphic Artist, but I made time to focus on my online coursework, while also adding to my personal practice of yoga. Within six months I was able to finish my 200 hour teacher training course, and I received my certification in February of 2025. That was just the beginning of a new journey for myself. I’m still not 100 % sure where this will take me, but I hope to continue to learn and grow as I gain experience throughout the process.

I would’ve never pictured my life where it’s at right now in this very moment. If I would’ve told 2021 Marco that his life would take a turn within a couple of years he would’ve never believed me, but I don’t blame him.. Although it was hard to accept, I don’t regret my past. It’s helped shape me into the person I am today. I’m also forever grateful to have been given a second chance at life. Although I still struggle from time to time, I do my best to cherish the life I have. I try to remind myself that it’s the “little things” in life. Those moments called “glimmers” make life worth living for, and I think we forget about them sometimes. Learning to appreciate those things really does make all the difference. At least for me it does. Yoga really opened my eyes to a whole different perspective on life, and it’s really helped with my mental health as well. I hope I can inspire others to work on their own personal journey through the practice of yoga: connecting people to their mind, body, spirit, and the Earth, or whatever other way they wish to connect. Through my eyes, life is one big conscious connection after all.

-M. A.